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1. WHEN YOU SEE PEOPLE DOING SQUATS IN HIGH HEELS.

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2. WHEN YOU REALIZE IT’S THE GYM YOU DESERVE, BUT NOT THE GYM YOU NEED RIGHT NOW.

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3. WHEN REBELLIOUS PENSIONERS START TAKING OVER.

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4. WHEN YOUR GYM THREATENS YOU WITH DEATH IF YOU STOP TRYING.

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5. WHEN MACHINES RESEMBLE MALE GENITALIA.

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6. WHEN PEOPLE TAKE GAINING 3 LBS. A TAD TOO SERIOUSLY.

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7. WHEN EQUIPMENT STARTS TRYING TO KILL YOU.

78. YOUR LIFE GOAL IS TO BE A POKEMON MASTER. BUT EVERYONE’S JUST TRYING TO GET SHREDDED FOR STEREOSONIC.
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9. WHEN YOU REALISE ALL YOU NEED IS A TREADMILL AND PRE-WORKOUT.

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10. REMEMBER THE OTHER EQUIPMENT THAT TRIED TO KILL YOU? YEAH, WELL IT’S GOT FRIENDS.

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11. YOU’VE SEEN A TREADMILL REAP THE SOUL OF A HUMAN BEING.

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12. IF THE PLACE IS RUN BY PEOPLE WITH THE IQ OF A DUMBBELL.

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13. AN ENTIRE BAND PROCEEDS TO PLAY MUSIC EVERY TIME YOU TRY TO DO CARDIO. LIKE IT WASN’T HARD ENOUGH IN THE FIRST PLACE.

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14. THINGS ARE STARTING TO GET WEIRD… LIKE, REALLY WEIRD.

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15. YOU HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL THE LATEST EPISODE OF SURVIVOR IS OVER BEFORE YOU CAN USE A MACHINE.

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